one clue

thursday

in celebration of today being thursday, i wanted to share a couple memories of thursdays past ...

the epic mr. thursday

in my parents' ward, there lived a very good looking young man. uh huh.

i had met this guy before my mission, so when i returned, we caught up quickly/briefly my first sunday back in the states. after church that day, my little sister's boyfriend suggested that i ask this guy out. for thursday. (please note that the suggested thursday was exactly one week from the time i stepped off the plane.)

i said okay.

so i quickly grabbed the phone and called him up. he was more than obliging and agreed that thursday would be an excellent day for a date. and it was.

thursday came and, for the date, we watched spiderman (the first one -- because the second one would be coming out in just a few weeks -- see? trying to set it up for an automatic second date) and then made churros, brazilian style. (pretty similar to the mexican treat, but just imagine those cinnamon-and-sugar-covered sensations filled with chocolate. mmm. drool, drool. those alone are the reason i gained 10 pounds in one of my mission areas. really.)

that thursday night, mr. thursday and i stayed up talking until 1. which was super late for a girl that just got off her mission a week ago! but so much fun!

mr. thursday and i went out a handful of other times after that. but it wasn't meant to be ... something i noticed when i unfortunately kept burning the kid every time we talked. it was awful. (and fodder for some follow-up don't-do-it-this-way posts.)

sigh.

naked thursday

a couple months ago, a friend and i decided that we would give up on becoming cpa's and instead start a promotional button-making business. y'know, the kind of buttons that we used to wear in high school whenever there were student elections coming up. (don't have any idea if kids still use those. do they? am i dating myself here?)

anyway, after coming up with some pretty snazzy slogans and clever commentaries, we decided that our skills could better be used in the t-shirt making business. that decision pretty much came as a result of this genius:

get it? ha ha ... get it?

there you go. happy thursday, everyone.

haven't drowned yet

okay, this morning i drank 2 16-oz bottles of water during a 2-hour meeting. and left the meeting thirsty. this was after drinking 16 oz of hot chocolate before the meeting. with my lunch, i drank another bottle. and now, after lunch, i have drunk 2 more bottles.

let's tabulate ... that makes ... 6 16-oz bottles ... which is 96 oz of water today ... which is equal to 12 8-oz glasses.

how many do they recommend? nutritionists recommend 8 8-oz glasses per day. so far, during a period of 8 hours, i have had 12. that's 150% of the recommended. and ... since the water at home doesn't come in 16-oz bottles, i have no idea how much more i will have before the day is through.

yesterday i had 3 bottles before heading home, plus my 16-oz morning hot chocolate and 2 glasses of water with lunch. last week was pretty much the same about 3 bottles a day plus hot chocolate and whatever i drank at lunch.

and the interesting thing is that i don't feel like i am getting too much water: i'm not sick of pouring it down my throat. in fact, i only really notice how much i am drinking because of all the bottles i put in the recycle trash at the end of the day. and the number of times i get up throughout the day to grab more water bottles from the break room. and the fact that our socal audit practice leader (yeah, he's pretty high-up) made fun of my empty water bottles after the meeting this morning. yeah.

my questions are these: how much water is too much? am i going to drown from all this drinking? and would i know it before it happens? are there warning signs? and why can i not stinkin' get enough water in my body?

you know when you reach that point where you're just like, "oh, i cannot drink any more water"; when it just almost tastes gross because you have had too much? yeah, haven't reached that point yet. glug, glug, glug ...

(p.s. -- for all you eco-friendlies out there ... my firm actually just installed a water machine today. so i won't be filling any more landfills with my water bottle waste.)

news

i don't watch the news often, as many of you know, and i have to admit it is because sometimes news reports actually seem to be this ridiculous to me ...

Breaking News: Series Of Concentric Circles Emanating From Glowing Red Dot

picture - kid rock & sheryl crow

[kid rock:]
livin' my life in a slow hell
different girl every night at the hotel
i ain't seen the sun shine
in three damn days

been fuelin' up on cocaine and whiskey
wish i had a good girl to miss me
Lord, i wonder if i'll ever change my ways

i put your picture away
sat down and cried today
i can't look at you while i'm lying next to her

i put your picture away
sat down and cried today
i can't look at you while i'm lying next to her

[sheryl crow:]
i called you last night in the hotel
everyone knows but they won't tell
but their half-hearted smiles tell me somethin' just ain't right

i've been waitin' on you for a long time
fuelin' up on heartaches and cheap wine
i ain't heard from you in three damn nights

i put your picture away
i wonder where you been
i can't look at you while i'm lyin' next to him

i put your picture away
i wonder where you been
i can't look at you while i'm lyin' next to him

[together:]
(sheryl crow) i saw you yesterday with an old friend
(kid rock) it was the same old same 'how've you been?'
(together) since you've been gone my worlds been dark and grey
(kid rock) you reminded me of brighter days
(sheryl crow) i hoped you were comin' home to stay
(sheryl crow) i was headed to church
(kid rock) i was off to drink you away

[together:]
i thought about you for a long time
can't seem to get you off my mind
i can't understand why we're living life this way

i found your picture today
i swear i'll change my ways
i just called to say i want you to come back home

i found your picture today
i swear i'll change my ways
i just called to say i want you to come back home

i just called to say i love you -- come back home

whine

1. my back hurts.

2. i want to eat beef.

3. i don't get to go to texas this weekend (thanks, ike).

4. i can't seem to eat enough chocolate today.

5. too much work, not enough time.

okay, i think that will do for now. i'll let you know if i think of anything else.

2, 3, cha cha cha

on my recent seattle trip, a friend of mine introduced me and the other road-trippers to cha cha. (yes, i plan on posting an entertaining seattle travelog for y'all soon.)

per the cha cha website,

"cha cha is like having a smart friend you can call or text for answers on your cell phone anytime for free! cha cha works with virtually every provider and allows people with any mobile phone device - from basic flip phones to advanced smart phones - to ask any question in conversational english and receive an accurate answer as a text message in just a few minutes.

"what’s your question?simply text your question to 242242 (spells ‘cha cha’) or call 1-800-2-cha-cha (800-224-2242) from your mobile phone to ask any question. what are you waiting for? ask away!"

sounds pretty cool. when my friend told us about it, she said that one of her friends had been heading to a job interview but got lost on the way, so she texted cha cha with her location and her destination and they texted her back with detailed driving instructions. i thought that was pretty cool. so we tried it out.

me: what is a bumbershoot?

cha cha: bumbershoot is an awesome music festival that supports the arts usually labor day weekend in seattle, wa.

well, yeah. we were just at bumbershoot the day before. but that wasn't quite the answer we were looking for ... rephrase!

me: what does the word "bumbershoot" mean?

cha cha: bumbershoot means umbrella. etymology: bumber- (alteration of umbr- in umbrella) + -shoot (alteration of -chute in parachute).

how about something a little more difficult ...

me: what is the next prediction of nostradamus in the timeline?

cha cha: nostradamus says that the earth as we know it will cease to be on dec. 21st 2012.

me: what percentage of the mormon church is composed of europeans?

cha cha: a very small percentage of mormons are europeans, probably less than 5% based on the top 10 countries with a mormon population.

hmmm ... well done! how about this?

me: what do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino?

cha cha: a elephino! (a hell if i know).

me: how much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

cha cha: the sad answer is probably none. woodchucks, better known as groundhogs, prefer burrowing to climbing trees.

wow, they are really on top of this stuff!

how about one more ...

me: how do i get out of paying child support?

cha cha: well, the best way to get out of paying child support is to stay with your children. if that isn't possible, then pay.

well, there you go!

poked and prodded

"the veins in my left arm are tiny and blood flows slowly."

that's what i told the phlebotomist last time i went in. that's what i tell the phlebotomist every time i go in. the saturday morning phlebotomists already know me and know my veins, so there's usually no confusion. but this last time was a tuesday evening. the tuesday-evening phlebotomist didn't believe me.

"well, what about this vein right here?" she asked, pointing to a tiny vein in my left elbow pit.

"they usually can't get that one; it's too tiny."

"i think i can get it ... see it there?"

"well, you can try, but the last time they tried, they couldn't get it and it flowed too slowly."

"i think i can get it ..."

"you can try, but it usually doesn't work. usually they just poke this vein here in my wrist or the one in my hand."

"i think i can get it."

with that, she started sterilizing my left elbow pit with the iodine and betadine ... okay, we'll try it!

and she got the needle in! that was pretty painless. so she opened the valve and let the saline solution begin to flow into the vein. the vein was flowing slowly. interesting. and oddly surprising. i kinda wish someone had said that the vein is too tiny and flows slowly. wait -- i think *i* actually said that. lemme check ... yeah. i did. i said it. i told her. i warned her.

because the vein was so tiny and flowing so slowly, the saline started to fill my whole elbow pit area, forming a growing lump ...

so, as i sat there watching my elbow get larger as it filled with saline, i could do nothing besides just chuckle on the inside and listen as the phlebotomist suggested that maybe we poke the vein in my wrist or in my hand. which she did: she pulled the needle out of my left arm elbow pit and put a new one in my wrist, where i happen to have *huge* veins. pronto. the rest of the platelet donation visit was pretty uneventful. i watched the other boleyn girl (great movie), and enjoyed many snacks.

that night, i took the bandage off and the lump was still there. so i put the bandage back on. in the morning the lump was still there. and i started getting a big bruise. fun times! so i called the red cross, y'know, just to check. the phlebotomist told me that because "we" had ruptured the vein (i *love* how she included me as one of the culprits), i should expect the lump and the bruise to remain for about 10 days.

after 10 days, my elbow still looked like this:

so ... the bruise has now healed and my elbow has returned to mostly normal. there's still a bit of a lump in there. it's been a month. oh, well.

don't you fret, though: this experience isn't keeping me from donating platelets (i went again last night) ... but i *am* going to be more adamant with the tuesday-evening phlebotomists, that's for sure.

(p.s. -- is there an actual name for the "elbow pit"? i feel kinda dumb calling it the "elbow pit".)

meatatarian

i just saw the most fabulous commercial for the new wendy's baconator.

there's a couple sitting in the wendy's dining room, enjoying lunch. the chick offers a bite of her salad to the guy, but he turns her down with an, "ah, no thanks. i'm a meatatarian." "a what?" "a meatatarian. y'know, beef, bacon. it's a personal choice. you gotta be committed."

friends, i am a meatatarian.

... i mean, i'm a recovering meatatarian.

... man, this is hard.

post script

i just wanted to thank everyone for your comments on my last post. i am so blessed with good friends and family. thank you!!

also, just wanted to clarify something: even though i am happy with my life as it is and ... [insert text from previous post] ... i still like to get set up! i think it's so much fun to get to know new people! i especially appreciate knowing that my friends and family are keeping an eye out for me. so ... if any of y'all have any suggestions for me ... send 'em over!

:P