snail mail

i haven't opened mail in over a month. i haven't had time, people! lately i get home from work, grab my mail off the table, walk it to my room, and *lovingly* place it in the "mail pile" on the floor in front of my dresser before crashing on my bed.

(incidentally, the mail pile sits right in front of the clean-and-folded-but-not-put-away-because-i-still-haven't-had-time-to-unpack-from-my-utah-idaho-texas-and-vegas-trips clothes pile. i am considering implementing a new no-flying-until-you-unpack-from-your-last-trip rule. but then i might never get out of this place.)

so today after church and church, i came home on a mission. my mission: to open and deal with everything in the mail pile. the clean-and-folded-but-... clothes pile would have to wait for another day.

but it was definitely time to get through that mail pile. i mean, for all i knew, my long-lost lover had written me the most beautiful, poetic, sugary, sticky love letter pen ever put to paper ... so ... obviously ... i couldn't keep him waiting any longer.

it took me about an hour, but i made it through the whole stack. the mail pile brought adventures and intrigue. behold:

• 3 surveys. people want my opinion! they do!

monitoring the future survey, from the university of michigan. (been filling that one out annually since high school.)

equal employment opportunity survey, from cal state northridge. (to be a part-time instructor.)

customer service survey, from my bank. (i bank online; why can't the surveys be online, too. i'd probably get to them faster that way.)

• an apheresis award from the red cross. so i logged in to my account where i found out that i have donated 35 times since moving to los angeles -- 35 times! just imagine how many lives i have saved!! :P

  and while i was on that roll, i went ahead and called to set up a new appointment for next week.

• 1 check that i have been awaiting for about a month. hmmm. maybe i shoulda gone through this stack a while ago ...

• 3 letters from my car dealership, congratulating me on my purchase. i feel pretty special to have received 3 letters. no, none of the letters included a get-out-of-jail-free card on the car payment. drat.

• an official letter from the state board letting me know that i passed my tests! guess they didn't hear my joy. that's okay -- let's celebrate again!

and ... umm, that was it. with all that and a (large) handful of statements and credit card offers, i had dug it down to the carpet.

and there was nothing else.

no love.

no poetry.

no sugary, sticky.

what's up with that?

who even invented snail mail?